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Ethical Editing

Someone told me recently "Ventilators kill people," adding, "70% of people put on ventilators die. They're killing people." So I argued with her.

But what if she'd written an article and hired me to edit it? What if her article began exactly as above? What would I do?

My first "edit" would complain that "Ventilators kill people" is stated like fact while, since it's not common knowledge and it's not yet supported by facts, it can only be opinion. I'd suggest she change it to read "I think ventilators kill people." Then, if the article contains an argument to prove her statement, she could end with "So, ventilators kill people" as her conclusion.

Next I would complain about the 70% statement, arguing that writers should not deliberately mislead their readers. Looking for minimal edits, I'd suggest "70% of victims put on ventilators die" or "70% of people put on ventilators still die," (since people sick enough to go on ventilators are already actively dying). Better might be "70% of victims put on ventilators are not saved." If asked how I would phrase it, I'd suggest "30% of people put on ventilators are saved, but 70% still die," but that's probably because I prefer being positive.

Finally, I'd argue that "They're killing people" is false. You might as well say bread kills people because, eventually, 100% of people who eat bread die. Maybe I'd edit it to read "They're not saving everyone," or "They're not a magic bullet" if you want to be more imaginative. But...

Of course, by this point, the author might feel there's a disconnect between what they want to say and what I want them to say. They'd be right, and we would part ways, not through any fault of the author, but because I could not be party to risking lives with lies.

So, thank you for reading my rant, and please may I conclude by ethically editing that friend's statements:

Ventilators save people. 30% of victims put on ventilators survive. Ventilators don't save everyone and are not magic bullets, but they're essential if we want to keep the death rate down. Please can we have more ventilators!

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The importance of commas

I saw a blogpost entitled "Can a Comma Be Antisemitic?" So of course, I had to read it. You can find the original post at  https://weekly.israelbiblecenter.com/can-a-comma-be-antisemitic/ . And it's fascinating. The question is: What's the difference between "The Jews, who persecuted the Lord, drove us out" and "The Jews who persecuted the Lord drove us out." Or equivalently, what's the difference between "We have to throw out apples, which are wormy" and "We have to throw out apples which are wormy"? The article explains how the comma makes all the difference between a restrictive and a nonrestrictive clause. In the first (apple) case, all apples are wormy and must be thrown out. In the second, we restrict ourselves to discarding wormy apples - a much more sensible idea. (And in 1 Thessalonians 2:14-15, those commas really might be misplaced.) In the Bible, commas matter! In writing,  commas matter!

If I'd only put an X instead of one

It was an old song, sung on an old scratchy record, and I loved it. The protagonist in the musical tale had won some kind of lottery, and wished he hadn't. At least, that's how I remember it. So now he lamented, "If I'd only put an X instead of one." Maybe it was the tune. Maybe it was the fact that the song really did tell a story. Or the singer's voice. Or knowing I could only hear it if Mum and Dad would put the record on for me... We signed up for healthcare recently - got help with it, because, well, it's kind of a really big deal and we didn't want to make any mistakes. But then I couldn't create my online account, so I called the helpline. "Ah, we're having problems with the website. Just wait till January," they said. Then, "Ah, we're having problems with the website. Just wait a few more days." Then, "Ah, it's the website. Don't worry; you really are insured." Which helped, a bit. Then I ph